When Abraham was 100 years old, Isaac was born.  Before Isaac was born, his wife, Sarah had decided that God had taken too long to fulfill His promise of a son, so she took her handmaiden named Hagar and went to her husband Abraham and said God promised you that you were going to be a father of many nations.  I love you and revere you, Abraham, I stand with you, and I look up to you, you are a man of integrity, a man of honor, you’re a Godly man.  I want all of God’s plans to be fulfilled in your life.  So, Sarah said, I want you to sleep with my young handmaiden Hagar and have a son.  Abraham wasn’t protecting his wife.  He heard her, he was stimulated in his nether regions, and he did not protect his wife from herself.  Women, you need to understand that if you have a Godly man that you love and adore, he not only has to protect you from others, his job is also to protect you from yourself.  But God helps you if you bring him trouble.  Men, God, help you if you do not protect your wife.  Men, you need to take a 1 Corinthians approach to marriage.  You need to cover your wife, protect your wife, and seal your wife. You need to let her be praised for her greatness.


So, Abraham goes and sleeps with Hagar, and they have a boy, and his name is Ishmael.  Ishmael is daddy’s little buddy.  He is his hunting partner and fishing partner.  They catch the ball game together, and they play games together.  They have a loving friendship.  Abraham is constantly sharing with him things and ministering to him because he loves his son.  There is no bond, like a father and a son or a father and a daughter.  I’m not saying it’s not special with a mother, but if you want to know who a child belongs to, they don’t check the blood of the baby to find out who the mother is they do it to find out who the daddy is.  Momma is the heart of the home, but daddy is the head of the home.  A child desperately needs a daddy.  Abraham and Ishmael were close.

Sarah gets pregnant, and they have a baby now, and they name him Isaac.   It was Sarah’s idea that he sleep with Hagar and have Ishmael.  Instantaneously now, Sarah has begun to turn her back; she has begun to nag.  The Bible says better to live on the roof than with a nagging woman.  Women let me say something here.  If you want to turn your husband’s heart away from you, begin to be a nagger.   When you nag a man, you will never get to his heart.  When you go up and cozy up close and look at him with your eyes and flash your beautiful smile that he fell in love with, you will hold his heart in your hand.  You see, the devil will get women to nag so the devil can turn him off.  If you say how come my husband listens sometimes, and sometimes he doesn’t?  It’s because you nag him.  He does not even realize it.  He does it because God does not speak to us in our spirits like that, and we are a spirit.  If he is a Godly man and he is getting nagged, since that is how he has been made and conditioned to communicate, he will turn you off.


So, Sarah, who has asked him to do it, is now nagging him and is turning on him.  In Genesis, it says,

“and the child grew and was weaned, and Abraham made a great feast on the day that Isaac was weaned.  Now Sarah saw the son of Hagar the Egyptian, who she had born to Abraham mocking.” Genesis 21:8-9 NASB

Ishmael was mocking his little brother.  I’m telling you there isn’t anything like a momma bear when she thinks her baby is being mocked.

“Wherefore, she said to Abraham, drive out this maid and her son, for the son of this maid shall not be an heir with my son Isaac.” Genesis 21:10 NASB

Powerful words.  Months ago, she was telling him to sleep with this woman, telling him it was God’s plan.  Now she won’t even call Hagar a woman; she calls her a maid.  She is the help.  Women, you need to watch your mouth because some of the things you once called godly, you are now cursing.  You are eating the fruit of your words.


Sarah was just as much responsible for Abraham’s sin, but it was Abraham’s job to protect her, and he didn’t.   Genesis 21:11 says, “And the matter distressed Abraham greatly because of his son.”  You see, he didn’t mind getting rid of Hagar, he didn’t want to get rid of Ishmael.  You may be asking yourself, how can she give him children and he not want to be her husband?  You see, the problem is this, Abraham never loved Hagar.  Some of you women are crying and asking, “why does this man not love me?”  The problem is this: he never did.  You need to stop crying over the love of a man you never had.  Why let the devil hold you in pain today over the love of a dad you never had, or the love of a man you never had?


Abraham was distressed because it was a matter of his son.

“But God spoke to Abraham, do not be distressed because of this lad and the maid.  Whatever Sarah tells you, listen to her.  For throughout Isaac, your descendants shall be named.”  Genesis 21:12 NASB

Sarah sinned, but God didn’t hold it against her because Abraham didn’t protect her.  How can your wife be perfect?  Because it is the husband’s job to protect.  Women, if you can find a man who will love you like 1 Corinthians 13, if you will find a man that will cover you,  he will be stubborn and at times even frustrate you, but if you can find this man, you will have a loyal man until the day you die.  God said to Abraham, listen to Sarah, I gave you Sarah.  Most would be running around saying, “I got into this problem because of this woman.”  But see, Abraham had already accepted that it was his fault, he wasn’t holding a grudge against Sarah, he loved her.  You see ladies, some of you are in love with men that are not in love with you.  Abraham wasn’t in love with Hagar.  He was in love with Sarah.


God still loved Sarah, and God said to Abraham, I’m going to work through Sarah.  Isn’t it amazing, Sarah told him to commit adultery, Sarah told him to ignore God, and now God is using her?  Do you know what the problem is?  So many men are expecting women to be perfect when you are not.  If you’re not perfect, you don’t have the right to expect that of your wife.  God may have tried to bring you a woman that he designed, but you didn’t like her for any amount of reasons, well let me tell you something when God brings her into your life, don’t you settle for Hagar.  I heard a story of a gorgeous young girl with an unbelievably gorgeous heart who was raised in a broken home.  She was promiscuous, but running from man to man did not fulfill her.  She said I’m not doing this again.  One time she was visiting with a man, wasn’t even a boyfriend, just a man, and he asked her if she wanted to fool around, and she said yes.  Just a few short days later, she started to feel the symptoms of herpes.  Let me tell you, shortly after that, she gave her hands into the hands of another woman and asked God to forgive her.  Asked God to speak into her life and set her free, and He did.  If a man is smart, he will come along and see her as a new creation.  He won’t see her as a person that had herpes, won’t see her as a promiscuous person, he won’t see her past.  He will only see her future.  She has the potential to have an amazing heart because she was a Hagar, but some man is going to make her a Sarah.

“And of the son of the maid, I will make a nation also because he is your descendant.”  Genesis 21:13 NASB

God is saying, listen, I am going to bless you because this child is yours.  This child was born out of sin, but God is still going to bless him.

“So Abraham rose early in the morning and took the bread and a skin of water and gave them to Hagar, putting them on her shoulder and gave her the boy and sent her away.  She departed and wandered about the wilderness of Beersheba.  And the water in the skin was used up, and she left the boy under one of the bushes. Then she went and sat down opposite of him about a bowshot away from where she said do not let me see the boy die.  And she sat opposite of him and lifted her voice and wept.  And God heard the lad crying, and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven and said to her, what is the matter with you, Hagar?  Do not fear, for God has heard the voice of the lad where he is.  He says, do not fear Hagar we know who his father is.” Genesis 21:14-18 NASB

If you enjoyed this blog, it is an excerpt from Hondo’s book, DEAD MAN’S BONES, you can see it when you CLICK RIGHT HERE.

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